Vox

Tragedy

If any of my readers live in Chandler, Saturday would be a good time for a car wash A small gesture that might provide a small amount of comfort to the family, just in knowing that people care.
UPDATE: New story link

Ashley was in the Ballet Etudes productions with two of my young family members for the last several years - she was very talented and sweet. Such a loss for her family and friends.

There's more....

No, I didn't actually know Ashley. I knew of her, and some of my family knew her pretty well. I think this is probably quite hard for them.

From the first Ballet Etudes performance I saw, Ashley was a standout. I didn't know her name at the time and she wasn't a soloist, at least not by the conventional definition. She was in the featured groups - one of the sugar plums, one of the Chinese dancers, one of the wicked step-sisters. She had such a bright, dynamic presence you couldn't help focusing on her - this tiny girl who filled the stage.

I remember after one show, seeing her backstage and commenting to my brother how much I enjoyed watching her performance. His response was, "Ashley? Yeah, she is pretty special" So, then I knew her name and I agreed that she was special. I looked forward to seeing her almost as much as I looked forward to seeing my girls.

Through the years I watched her get ever more special and difficult roles, the last two years dancing the part of the Snow Queen in the Nutcracker. She seemed to grow ever more special as well - one of those teenagers who makes you see the possibilities open to her, not the problems adolescence can bring. There are many great kids in the Ballet Etudes family and any of them would be a horrible loss - I just was particularly touched by her bright, warm smile and talent.

The car wash: Often people hold these memorial car washes to help a grieving family. When a parent dies, particularly a bread winner, there is a financial burden left for the family. In those instances a couple hundred dollars can ease the stress. When a child dies the burden is different. I don't believe a couple of extra dollars will ease their pain (in fact, I wouldn't be surprised to find they donated the money to a cause Ashley would have supported - dance scholarships, perhaps) I do think that knowing dozens of people took the time to show up and contribute, to let them know their daughter was a bright light in the world and that she will be missed, may be a comfort.

Consider also how her friends must feel. Faced with such a tragedy, there is often an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. In this car wash her friends get to come together and do something. Show they care, give to this family. In the old tradition that had our mothers delivering casseroles to a grieving family, these youngsters are giving of their time in an effort to ease the Mitchell's grief.

Posted by Vox at March 19, 2004 01:39 PM | people